Pregnant Woman Says Her Brother-in-Law Asked Her to Pick Up His Son Because She’s “Home Anyway,” Then Got Mad When She Told Him to Hire a Nanny Instead

A pregnant woman says a favor for her brother-in-law has turned into unexpected family tension.

She and her husband live just one street away from his brother and sister-in-law, who have a 9-year-old son. Because they live so close, she occasionally helps out when something comes up.

But recently, a last-minute request — and the reasoning behind it — left her feeling taken advantage of.

a pregnant woman sitting in a red chair — Photo by Kawê Rodrigues

The Last-Minute Call

According to the woman, her brother-in-law called one day asking if she could pick up his son from school.

The grandparents, who normally handle pickup, had suddenly become unavailable.

He asked if she could step in — and added that since she’s a housewife and “probably doesn’t have anything going on,” it should be easy for her.

He also said rearranging his and his wife’s schedules would be “a headache.”

The comment rubbed her the wrong way, but she agreed anyway because she didn’t want her nephew stuck waiting at school for hours.

More Than Just a Pickup

The favor ended up being more work than expected.

Not only did she pick him up from school, but she also had to prepare him lunch.

She explained that her pregnancy has been difficult and she’s been very sick in her third trimester, often relying on ordering food instead of cooking.

But her nephew isn’t allowed to eat outside food — meaning she had to cook something from scratch despite feeling unwell.

That experience made her realize she couldn’t keep doing last-minute childcare.

Drawing a Boundary

After helping that day, she told her brother- and sister-in-law that it couldn’t happen again.

She suggested they arrange backup childcare — like hiring a nanny or using daycare — so they wouldn’t need to rely on family members at the last minute.

Her suggestion didn’t go over well.

Since then, she says they’ve been making passive-aggressive comments toward her.

They’ve even hinted that she might regret damaging the relationship with the closest relative who could help once her own baby arrives.

Why the Situation Confuses Her

Part of the reason she’s frustrated is that the family can afford childcare.

In fact, the nephew attends private school and the couple owns several expensive sports cars.

She says hiring a nanny wouldn’t be unusual in their family either, since both sides grew up with nannies themselves.

The issue, she believes, is simply that they prefer not to spend money if they can avoid it.

The Fear of Future Expectations

Even after the disagreement, her in-laws still occasionally contact her asking for help with their son’s homework.

That makes her worry they may expect even more help once her baby arrives.

She admits the requests don’t happen very frequently — maybe once every few months — but the assumption that she has “nothing going on” still bothers her.

Why Reddit Sided With Her

Many readers felt the core problem wasn’t the favor itself but the attitude behind it.

User RJack151 wrote:

“You don’t owe anyone your time or labor.”

Others pointed out that the brother-in-law’s reasoning — that rearranging his own schedule would be inconvenient — showed he expected someone else to take responsibility instead.

User JDLPC said the request would have been very different if it had been framed respectfully:

“The problem isn’t that they asked. It’s that they assumed you have nothing else going on.”

A Boundary Before the Baby Arrives

With her due date approaching, the woman says she’s now wondering if she handled the situation correctly.

But many readers believe setting a boundary now may actually prevent bigger problems later — especially once she’s caring for a newborn.

After all, what started as an occasional favor could easily become an expectation.

Willow and Hearth