Have you ever met someone who just exudes calmness? You know the type — they’re the ones who manage to keep their cool during a crisis, always have a soothing word, and seem to float through life like they’ve mastered some ancient art of zen. But here’s the kicker: beneath that serene surface, they might be grappling with some pretty intense internal battles. It’s like they’re a duck paddling furiously underwater while appearing all graceful on the surface. Let’s chat about four common struggles that those calm folks often face, and maybe you’ll find some familiarity in their stories.
1. Anxiety That’s Just Waiting to Bubble Over
Take a moment to think about that calm friend of yours who always seems to have it all together. What you might not realize is that they could be fighting a hefty dose of anxiety. You see, anxiety doesn’t always come in the form of panic attacks or visible distress. Sometimes, it’s just that quiet hum in the background, like a refrigerator that’s running but you can’t see it. They might be worrying about their job, relationships, or even the state of the world — all while maintaining that cool facade.
Being the calm one can feel like a safety net, too. If they act composed, maybe they can convince themselves that everything’s okay. But let’s be honest: that can be exhausting. It’s like carrying around a backpack full of rocks while everyone else thinks you’re just strolling through the park. So, if you notice your calm friend acting a bit off, don’t hesitate to check in. Sometimes, just lending an ear can help them unload some of that weight.
2. The Pressure to Always Be “On”
Ever feel like there’s a spotlight on you, and you have to be your best self all the time? That’s the reality for many of those chill people in our lives. When you’re known for being calm, there can be this unspoken pressure to always show up that way — as if they’ve signed a lifelong contract to be the emotional support rock for everyone else. They might feel guilty for showing any cracks in their armor because they fear that they’ll let others down.
Imagine being the “calm friend” at a party, and someone suddenly wants to share their deepest fears. While they’re having a mini meltdown, you’re expected to be the soothing balm. It’s a lot of work! The truth is, everyone has off days; even the calmest among us need a moment to breathe and be vulnerable. So, if you know someone who carries that title, remind them that it’s perfectly okay to step off the pedestal every now and then.
3. A Fear of Burdening Others
Calm people often pride themselves on being the ones others can lean on. But here’s the catch: they can also struggle with the fear of being a burden. They may feel that if they share their own issues, they’ll be adding weight to someone else’s load. So, instead of opening up about their struggles, they bottle it up, convincing themselves that their problems aren’t as significant as others’.
This can create a vicious cycle. They’re so busy supporting others that they forget to take care of themselves. It’s like being a lifeguard who’s drowning but still trying to save everyone else. It’s important for them to understand that sharing their struggles doesn’t make them a burden; it makes them human. Encouraging open dialogue about feelings can help them feel safe and supported, reminding them that they’re not alone in this wild ride called life.
4. The Struggle with Self-Doubt
Here’s a little secret: even the calmest folks can be wrestling with self-doubt. Those moments of self-criticism and questioning their worth can sneak in when you least expect it. They may project an image of confidence, but inside, they could be wondering if they’re really doing enough or if they’re actually fooling everyone. The classic “imposter syndrome” can easily find a cozy home in calm personalities.
Think about it: every time they give advice or lend support, they might think, “Who am I to say this?” It’s a frustrating and isolating feeling, especially when they’re the ones everyone turns to for reassurance. Remind them that it’s okay to have doubts. Everyone does, even the ones who seem like they’re made of stone. A little encouragement can go a long way in helping them realize their true value.
More from Willow and Hearth:
Leave a Reply